It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
