I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
At least life still wants to fuck me.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize
