Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
