Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
Randomize
