New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize
