I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Randomize