My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fill condoms, not promises.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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