worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize