Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Randomize
