the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
We were destined to go to rehab together
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
