Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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