You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
