Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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