i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
