And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
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