Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Randomize
