I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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