i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
