She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
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