he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
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