at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
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