okay pat passed out under dana's car
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
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