dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
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