Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Randomize
