it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
