For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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