I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
Randomize
