Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Randomize
