I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize
