Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Randomize
