i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
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