And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
