are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
Randomize
