how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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