may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
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