and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
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