I cockslap morals
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Randomize
