i broke my thumb. i no longer have 2 opposable thumbs. i'm sub-human. i love vicodin.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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