just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
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