Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
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