I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
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