But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
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seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
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Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch