He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
Dick very happy bro
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
