i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
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