Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
