living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
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