This girl is more easily done than said...
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
what day is it and did you see me today?
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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