i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
