ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
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