If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
