I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
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the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
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