i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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